A Gift Most Manly 1

Hello [Name], what's up?

I am going to visit a friend and I've been told I should bring a souvenir.

Ah, yes, I am very experienced in receiving gifts. Tell me about your friend.

You are statistically very close to them. What would you like?

Most people tend to buy me beard softeners, expensive hair products, or... I guess books. In fact, I've got a whole pile of those things, if you want one.

Feel free to grab one off of one of the book piles around here. I couldn't care less.

Not a fan of the book idea? I'm always disappointed too. There are so many words...

Ah, is that Book Pile.

It was on top of the pile... Is it good?

I have no idea. Reading gives me hives.

Oh, then how did you get to be a professor?

People just naturally do whatever I say. I'm very smart.

This book has a nice cover and soft edges, I'm sure your friend will enjoy it.